My Friends

Today is just another day.And I am here sitting to write yet another entry to my blog.You may think that I make an entry only when I am feeling low and really need to spill the beans,and in that case you are quite right in your assessment.

My life has always been easy...or I am lucky as you may say.Everything is perfect in my life.. loving family,loyal boyfriend,good education,prosperous career waiting ahead and whatever you feel that can make a person happy and cheerful..I have all of that and much more.Still then there are certain times when I feel it would have been better the other way or that certain changes are required.If anything is constant in this world it is the change.I was a happy and cheerful person with my simple and easygoing life...till when I decided to add a little complexity to it...and since then my life has been hell lot complicated.

Complications are not something that I would like to discuss on a public blog like this.But what I would like to share is what I feel,What I think and What are the consequences I think I will go through.

I am 20 years of age now and I have seen many friends come and go through.Friends would not be the perfect word as many of them were more like aquaintances and we interacted only when required.And what I feel is that we like the people only when we know just a little about them.
Think of the situation like this.A little girl has been given a beautiful doll made of cloth and cotton to her by her grand mother. The little girl loves playing with it because of its beauty and softness.But one day while playing,by accident she happens to tear the doll apart,and all the stuffing and cotton of the doll comes out.It is when the little girl acctually comes to know how ugly is the doll from inside and hence starts hating it and abandons it.

Similar to the above situation ,When you meet a new person,what you show that person is that you are a perfect person and have only good attributes in you.But it is a fact that no one is that perfect and evryone has certain drawbacks.Similarly it applies to the other person too.You like that person because you like his/her picture potrayed to you by himself/herself.As you start going into details of the person,the things would start resurfacing and then you may not be quite comfortable with the person and you say it is lack of compatibility,whereas it is acctually the understanding that is now coming your way. Love comes in misunderstanding,And when understanding comes,hatred comes along.

May be this is one of the reasons of the frequent break ups,heart breaks and broken relationships.It is also the reason of the trust being lost and the spaces that come between two people.It is not that the person changes,He has always been like that for his whole life,for a person's nature never changes,But what has changed is the way you look at the person,your perspective.

And this is definitely the case with me,and a lot of us.I have not changed at all.This is what I have been all my life,Its just that I am afraid of losing friends and family if I let out these attributes of me.And if I want to be loved,I should potray myself flawless and not let any one know about my weaknesses.

It is what I have learned from all my relationships,aquaintances that everything..and even when I am hurt,I choose to get to know more people..learn more about how the emotions really work,When is it the best time to continue it forward and when to let go...Cause if I give up then I would never know if a bright side to this exists...

So here I am....In the pursuit of the horizon....